Your Leadership Shirt: Wool or Silk?

As August winds down and we start yearning for the more moderate weather of early fall my thoughts have turned to the leadership roles we play and how they could be compared to different kinds of clothing. But first is the acknowledgment that the activities and efforts that we categorize as "leadership" are just that: roles. Whether you are President of the United States, CEO of a Fortune 500 company or Den Leader of your son's Cub Scout pack that is just a part you have agreed to play for a certain period of time. My question: how closely identified with that role are you?

Here in Houston we don't wear much wool, even in the coldest winter months. It is a heavier, denser fiber and can be itchy. At one point in my life wearing wool even caused me to break out in hives! On the other hand, silk, also a natural fiber that "breathes", is lighter and softer on the skin.

Think of those two fibers as different ways of wearing your leadership roles, your command clothes so to speak! When we let ourselves become overly identified with a role, taking it and ourselves too seriously, over time it will get heavy, dense and probably even itchy. When we are wearing that heavy wool leadership suit we are too insulated from those we are leading (and serving). We get too involved in our own perception of ourselves and we start to cling to the role because we've become overly identified with it. The expectations we put on ourselves (though we usually blame others for having the expectations) become burdensome and we get even itchier! Not a pleasant, or effective way to lead, and certainly no way to go through life.

What if we viewed our leadership role as a silk suit instead? Delicate, light and easy to wear. So lightweight, in fact, that we hardly feel the pressure of it at all. It doesn't feel like acting, it feels like us! We are free to move and breathe and to relax into the role knowing that it doesn't define us and that we will wear it only as long as it is for the highest good of all. Though light in weight silk can still keep a person warm. And a leadership role, approached with the right intention, can also be a warming light to all.

So, silk or wool? You decide... but I'm no fan of scratching so I'll take silk.

Baby You Get to Go a Long Way

My vacation from the news was quite successful during our ten day trip across the Midwest visiting some friends and family. The first few days it was hard to let go of email and Facebook but then my grip on my iPhone gradually loosened a bit as I relaxed into being present with loved ones. It helped my perspective to know that the world just keeps turning and the sky doesn't fall!

Certainly the highlight of our excursion was meeting our new, 6-week-old granddaughter, Tess. Nothing takes you back to the power and source of life like the birth of a new human. Holding her was a wonderful reminder of the perfection and wholeness at the center of everything. Babies, despite their apparent helplessness, seem so wise and cognizant. Wherever she had come from she was starting something new full of promise and possibility.

Being with her reminded me that we start over many times in life. We tend to struggle against the difficulties and learning that come with something new, but those challenges are nothing compared to what a baby encounters upon leaving the womb! To be so physically helpless, so dependent on others and yet so open to growth and change.... what a model for life. Every new endeavor of worth involves a time of learning new things and feeling frustrated that we can't just make it instantly "perfect". And why are we so afraid to admit to others that we don't have all the answers or that we need guidance?

There are some significant areas in my life right now where I am definitely starting over, or at least it feels like it. I'm grateful to have attracted a large number of really supportive people to help me make those transitions. Sometimes I wonder what it is that I don't know or what new surprise is coming around the corner. In these arenas I'm not leading, at least not the way I've been accustomed to before.

I am trying to be true to myself, learn the lessons that are put in my path, and keep remembering that I already accomplished the hardest change in my life many, many years ago. Thanks, Tess, for the reminder.

Take a "News-Cation"

I'm about to take a bit of a vacation starting tomorrow. Well deserved, if I do say so myself! I'm looking forward to a change of scenery and watching the world go by outside my car window. Yes, it's a road trip and not a short one. We're off to visit friends and family, including a new godling that came into this world just over a month ago. There's something about a vacation, even if it's eating cheetos and drinking Dr. Pepper in the front seat of a car driving down our highways and byways. It's a way to get a bigger and fresher perspective on what's really important. You know, that authentic life we sometimes get too busy to uncover.

And, here's another thing I'm planning on this trip and I highly recommend it to you: I'm taking a vacation from the "news" while I'm away. Sure, I might check in with The Weather Channel to make sure the old homestead isn't threatened by any tropical weather while I am away, but that's it. No CNN, no NYtimes.com, not even Yahoo News! I'll even try to take a break from Facebook. I've done it before so I know I'm capable. I can resist!

What I'll discover is that what passes for "news" usually really isn't. It's stuff that happened to someone, somewhere, and sometimes it's sad or tragic, but it's just life. Mostly it's people talking. Voicing their opinions and thoughts. And what happens is I can get all wrapped up in their talking and forget to listen to the voice inside me. The one that can't compete with all the external noise of life and only gets loud in the middle of the night and keeps me awake (which is really annoying!).

I'm looking forward to checking in with that voice during daylight hours while the American miles pass outside my window. Perhaps I'll even stop along the road and listen to the swoosh of the wind through a wheat field and remember how that sound fueled my girlhood dreams. I'll listen to robin song, baby's heart beating, the laughter of loved ones and the music of my choice. I'll forget all the noise of cynicism  and remember that I can turn it off whenever & where ever I want to.

Ah, it's going to be a great vacation. I can already hear it.